Every night I rush to my bed with hopes that maybe I'll get a chance to see you in my dream.

I hate looking at myself and realizing that I don't like what I see. I hate looking back at things I did and wondering why was I like that. Everyday there's something wrong. Just one trivial thing that can make me unhappy for just a moment. It's like not even possible to have a day without a bad feeling.

Exaggerating.

So I go on this merry go round trying to chase a love that can never be found.
Time to say goodbye.
It's over.

There wasn't anything I didn't love about you.
You'd do some stupid things and I'd laugh at those too.

Though you'd be the only one that can make me smile.
Though you'd be the only one that really knows how.
I gotta get you out of my system.

I replayed it over and over again.
You were my boy and now we ain't even friends.
You could have been my all or nothing.
But now to me you're nothing.

Put on a pedestal, boy I held you so high.
Was never to good at finding the words to describe.
Just how I felt of you but you know that I tried.
And you know exactly how I felt.

You damn near were my everything.
You're still in my mind.
But I'd rather be here all alone.
And I'm doing just fine.
Gotta take it back to the days before we met.
And live our lives as strangers again.

December days, my summer turned to winter when you went away.
I can't help but to wonder.
Was he worth my pain?
I cried and now I'm living with just memories.

I wish life had a backspace button.

Syaz said;
"Face the shit Mel, this is life"
I guess that's what I'm gonna do.

Dan Tak Mungkin-Agnes Monica

What am I supposed to say or do when I'm all choked up and you're okay.

Did someone break your heart inside?

isn't it ironic?
WE IGNORE THE ONE'S WHO ADORE US,
ADORE THE ONE'S WHO IGNORE US,
LOVE THE ONE'S WHO HURT US,
AND HURT THE ONE'S WHO LOVE US.

Tinggalkan Saja-Kotak

huhu .
I have abandon my blog for some time alrdy due to my exams .
3 weeks baybeh~crazy!
ohh crap . I have no idea what to talk abt .
I'm not really happy tht exams are finally over cause we still have the stupid Excel starting Nov 2nd .
SS really knows how to torture their students .

well, i think i wanna share a lil creepy story .
since im alrdy here and i hv no idea what to bla abt .
so here it goes,
Last last thusday there was a dead bird behind my class .
it look like it slid down the wall cause the wall had blood stains .
and it's feathers were everywhere .
disgusting .
Then last week, tuesday if I'm not mistaken .
there was a dead rat in my class .
and it smelt horrible man .
so we talked to our class teacher and she allowed us to take our exams in another class .
and the next day, there was another dead rat in my class .
GAWD~! it smelt like-only-God-knows .
I wanted to puke .
and so we took our exam in another class again .
Thank God now no more alrdy .

and you know what's creepy and what gives me goosebumps ?
those 3 creatures died on the same spot .
now, isn't that weird ? creepy~~

okay, sry for the lame post . lack of stories/ideas alrdy ne .
I hv no idea what to bitch abt .
I'll be bck soon~hopefully .

xoxo

You're Like A Recurring Nightmare.

Too many dreams of you last week.
I think all of those dreams has a meaning.
I don't know what do these dreams mean.
I'm curious.
Perhaps...
I need a dreams interpreter ?

I need YOU, whoever you are.
hha.
comment me in my blog or fb. ASAP!
lol.

Miss.Miss.Miss

I wish you were here Papa :D
To celebrate with me .
sigh .
Tears rolled down on my face when I received your text this morning .
Miss you loads !

RUGRATS :D

My bday gift from my maid .
Thanks kak Christina :D
berlah kecil bha, it's the thought tht counts bha kak . :)
It's name is Rugrats . (:

Why Does Love Always Feel Like A Battlefield ?

Both hands tied behind my back with nothing
Oh no, these times when we climb so fast to fall again
Why we gotta fall for it now
I never meant to start a war
You know I never wanna hurt you
Don't even know what we're fighting for

Random Is The Way I Like It :D

I took few personality kinda quizzes in facebook recently .
And I find SOME of them quite true .
hhe .
Here are the results .

Loves to joke around, Suave and Caring, Brave and Fearless.
Firm and has leadership qualities. Know how to console others.
Too Generous and Egoistic. Takes high pride of oneself. Thirsty for praises.
Extraordinary spirit. Easily Angered. Angry when provoked.
Easily Jealous. Observant, Careful and Cautious. Thinks Carefully.
Independent Thoughts. Loves to lead and to be led.
Loves to DREAM. Talented in arts, music, and defense.
Sensitive but NOT pretty. POOR RESISTANCE AGAINTS ILLNESS.
Loving and Caring. Loves to make new friends.

You wear your heart on your sleeves.
You are very in touch with your feelings and the feelings of others.
However, this oftens leaves you heartbroken. People take you and the things you do for granted.
Despite everything you've gone through life and relationship, you always find a way to recover.
(I think this one is really really true)

You have a split personality. One minute your you, and the next minute you have to put on a tough front.
You are very sexy. When you are on your though side, you are strong, sassy and aggresive.
But on the other side of you, you are sweet, and NOT VERY CONFIDENT. You like to have a good time,
and people love you too !


Well, what can I say about you. You Stand Out. Always have and always will.
Wheather you like it or not, people see you as crazy, friendly, freaky, cool, funny, outstanding person !
Everyone should like you for just being yourself, random is the way you like to live it. (:

And I answered those quizzes honestly okay peeps . :D

Tissue ? RAWR :D

He Said: Love Sucks .
I know what he means .
I know who is he talking about .
(:
______________________________________________________________________________________

Falling For The Second Time ?
Ouh Gawd !
I can't stand it when he starts blushing .
He makes me melt .
Everytime when he askes me for tissues .
or when he calls me Grace just for the fun of it .
and when he taught me maths yesterday . :D
and when he got the most votes in Basketball today . (:
aaaaaaaaaaaa .
Tissue !
The Guy Who Blushes Alot !
I miss you . RAWR :D

These Things I'll Never Say....

Hey "DR" a.k.a Purple Pen .

Can everything between us really get better?

Because it hurts like this.
And when i see you being effortless,
I get discouraged.
What am i fighting for??
Love??
With who??
For who??
For what??
I love you and i will always do.
Everything i do. EVERY single thing.
Its all for you.
And you...
You just don't see it.
You see nothing.

I miss you . :(

I Do Not Hook Up-Kelly Clarkson .

Oh Gawd !
F*ck NIE .
2000 word essay .
I just realised that I have not done my
goddamnit moral and sivik project .
And I'm not done with the NIE competition 's
2000 word essay .
And I have to pass it all up on monday .
Today's friday .
I doubt I can finish it up by Monday .
Damn it !
Where the hell are my group members ?
I'm so stressed out that I can cry .
I don't even know where to start .
I have got all the info(s) for the NIE essay .
Just need my mum to check if it's suitable .
I have no idea how the cover should be .


Meanwhile, I've been trying to release my stress .
Enjoying the last days of hols .
While counting the days for school to reopen .
Besides Facebook's Mafia Wars .
I have been on one of the most hilarious website .
Perez Hilton's website .
It's a goddamnit awesome website mann !
link, http:perezhilton.com/
And seventeen.com

gtg and continue with my stuffs .

Here are some LOL youtube videos links
- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNkp4QF3we8
- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=meu6WlGo8R4
- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=plKs24Uvk-s
- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_RgL2MKfWTo

Rich Girl-Gwen Stefani .

I'm gonna die of boredom soon .
Gawd! It's killing me .
I'm currently addicted to Facebook's Mafia Wars .
Atleast that helps me kill abit of my boredom .
:(
Dang~!
I've got the green eye now.
I kinda envy alot of people now .
Dang~!
It's not that I hate 'em or what but I just envy the things they have .
I envy the lifestyle they have, their hawt body, their bf's, their results .
And the list goes on, it never ends .
I'm a human . An average teenage girl . So yeah .

I want to get and achieve a list of things. A long list.

THE LIST .

1. Treadmill . ( I need to burn my goddamnit fats )
2. A laptop . (I know I've got two pc's already, still...)
3. The Body Shop ( I have a list of items)
4. I need a new pair of Nike shoes . ( I'm sick of my current one )
5. Roxy !
5. I need lotsa novels . (:
6. McD (I'm craving for McD now ) yumm .
7. More novels . (:
8. Caps ( currently obssesed with caps)
9. New hp .
10. Ipod .
11. Better grades .
12. Drink More Water .
13. Exercise . Workout !
14. HIM ! ( I desperately need him in my life)
* Fingers Crossed* Amen . :D

and the list goes on and on .


Actually, most of the things above ain't that hard to get or achieve .
But there are few hard to achive ones like number 11 and 13 .
But *fingers crossed* again . Amen . :D
And the absolutely impossible ones are number 1 and 14 .
Yeah, number 1 coz my dad will ask me to go for jogging not use the treadmill .
Lazy Bumm bha me . Adeyy .
And number 14 . Dang~! no idea .
*Fingers Crossed* Again . Amen . :D

I have no idea why this pass few days I've been using this "dang!" word so many times in a sentence sometimes . DANG ~!
see ?
Until my dad replied me and said "Dang, dong, ding, ur head la"
Dang~!
lol .

Jikalau Aku-Ezlynn .

To me, guys are all the same .
I'm sorry but it's true .
No matter how good they are .
They are still guys .
And they're all the same .
Senang betul ucap kata-kata love, miss kn ?
Like it dosen't even mean a thing to 'em .
Love, miss....do ya'll really understand the meaning of those words ?
Saying it like ya'll don't even mean it .
Miss...love....
wtf lah .
Look at your friendster profile..
The amount of girls you chat with...have you ever thought of me ?
But when I talk to guys..you will make such a big deal about it .
Miss...love..yeah right .
You say those words too much that it worths nothing anymore .
You said you love me . Well, prove it then .
How am I supposed to believe you ?
How am I supposed to give you a chance ?
Prove to me that everything you said is true .
haihh .

Untouched-The Veronicas .

I feel so untouched and I want you so much .

That I just can't resist you, it's not enough to say that I miss you .
I feel so untouched right now, need you so much .
Somehow I can't forget you, I've gone crazy from the moment I met you .

Oh, Purple Pen .
I miss you so damn much right now .
*sigh*
Words are not enough to describe how much I miss you right now .
Just wish that you know how much I love you .
I'm sorry :(
I should have left it like that .
I regret . sooo much .
I miss the way it used to be .
Friends Not Lovers .